Sunday, June 2, 2013

JUNE 2, 2013
IT'S REALLY P-A-U-L AND EARLENE'S 45th? THEY DON'T LOOK OLD ENOUGH.... THEY MUST HAVE BEEN MARRIED WHEN THEY WERE 4 YEARS OLD.

I AM VERY HAPPY TO REPORT EARLENE IS BACK FROM N.C. BOTH BAILEY AND CHAOS WERE XXXXXXXXXX

I WANTED TO USE THE EXTREMELY HAPPY WORD ?EUSTATIC??AND FOUND WITH SPELL CHECK THAT EUSTATIC MEANS A RISE IN SEA LEVEL-- NOT EVEN CLOSE.
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TODAY IS THE DAY I START WITH FIGHTING WITH THE PRINTER TO PUT 1148 NUMJBERS ON 1148 3/4 INCH DOTS-- THEN IF I AM LUCKY, A LIST OF THE 1148 PEOPLE WHO ARE POTENTIAL CANDIDATES FOR THE SHATUPON SOCIETY..

IT IS A BATTLE BETWEEN ME AND THAT #$%&*(^*) ( WIRELESS ) PRINTER.
IT TALKS TO ME---PERFECT SENTANCES
"YOU WANT ME TO --WHAT?".
" YOU WILL HAVE TO WAIT- I AM CHEWING UP THE LAST BIT OF PAPER"
"JUST MAKE DO WITH 647 NUMBERS- I AM TIRED"
"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO START WITH 648"
"YOU HAVE CAUSED ME TO EXSANGUINATE-NOW JUST TRY AND PUT IN A NEW INK CARTRIDGE"

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SPRING HAS CERTAINLY SPRUNG--- BETTER CHECK YOU COFFEE FOR FLOATERS-- FLYING ANTS ARE THE SPECIALITY HERE.
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THE BIG==HUGE== WONDERFUL SIGHT YESTERDAY WAS DAVID'S CANE NEXT TO THE FRONT DOOR.-- IT WS THERE ALL DAY--- REPLACED BY DUSTIN-- RMEMBER VALERIE'S QUOTE...."I SWAPPED MY CANE FOR A DANE" IN REAL LIFE..
THIS PLACE IS A PANACEA OF THINGS IN NEED OF A FIXER..HE IS GOOD.

 YESTERDAY'S CHALLANGE IS/(WAS) THE NEW YUPPIES DID NOT HAVE THE TIN DISH TO CATCH THE TREATS-- SO THERE WAS NOT THE IMMEDIATE NOISE OF SUCCESS . ? NONSENSE? TRY THE HUMAN EQUILIVANT OF QUARTERS HITTING THE METAL TRAY IN LOS VEGAS SLOT MACHINES.. YOU CAN WIN $2.00 AND THE NOISE IT MAKES CAUSES EVERYONE IN THE ROOM TO THINK YOU WON 2 MILLION. IT IS ALSO THE EQUILIVant of the concept of clicker s WHICH REQUIRE INSTANTANEOUS CLICK.-

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AND THEN WE HAD THE BABY DIAPER COOLING SYSTEM--

DAVID TELLS US--( YET TO BE TRIED TODAY) IF YOU TAKE ALL THE STUFFING OUT OF 2 BABY DIAPERS, SOAK IT IN WATER, THEN STUFF THE GELATONOUS GLOB INTO PANTY HOSE, YOU THEN HAVE THE "COOLING PACKETS" THEY USE IN IRAQ UNDER THEIR ARMOR AND IN THEIR HELMETS.

SO WE NEED PANTY HOSE TODAY TO TRY IT

YESTERDAY DAVE MADE GREAT STRIDES IN GOING TO A GROCERY STORE BUYING FLAVORED WATER.... NOW APPLY THAT CONCEPT TO GOING INTO A CUMBERLAND CONVENIENCE STORE ASKING TO BUY PANTY HOSE... HE JUST DOES NOT LOOK THE PANTY HOSE TYPE.

THAT IS AS BAD AS THE DAY I WENT INTO A DRUG STORE ASKING TO BUY 3 PREGNANCY TESTS ----- ( FOR THE DOGS-- DOESN'T SEEM TO WORK)

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ERIC AND OLIVER ARE OUT OF THE USUAL 24 HOUR SECLUSION AND OSCAR SEEMS TO HAVE TH E IDEA-- MNARIA TOOK THEM TO COSTCO FOR A TEST RUN.. THEY MADE IT

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FUNNY STORIE #782
GOT TO BE CAREFUL OF WHAT YOU WISH FOR....

I TRIED TO NAP ON A BAR STOOL IN TH E T TENT WITH NEAR DISASTEROUS RESULTS-- I MENTIONED TOTHE PEOPLE STANDING AROUND THAT I NEEDED A BETTER OUTSIDE NAPPING PLACE... JACK WENT DOWN THE DRIVEWAY WITH LAURA AND 1/2 MILE DOWN THE STREET WAS A MAN PUTTING OUT A RRECLINER WITHTHE WORD "FREE" ON IT..

I COULD NOT HAVE A BETTER ONE. LOOKS LIKE SOME CAT CLAWED ONE ARM-- BUT AROUND HERE THAT IS MINOR. AT LEAST THE ARM WASN'T EATEN.

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SOME CAMERA PEOPLE ARRIVED AND ARE STASHED SOMEWHERE--

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ALTHO WE CAN ALWAYS MAKE DO SOMEHOW, IN THE FUTURE IT MIGHT BE HELPFUL IF VISITING CP OVERNIGHTERS MADE CLEAR HOW MANY AND WHAT GENDER...

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NOW-- ALL YOU ENGLISH MAJORS.... I NEED HELP WITH A WORD...

THERE IS A WORD FOR A KIND OF SENTANDE WHERE THE TAIL END OF A SENTANCE IS-- UNUSUAL/A SURPRISE/ UNEXPECTED

 LIKE

" THE DOG BARKED SO HARD THE GARAGE DOOR WENT UP"

I SAW THT WORD SOMEWERE-- AND IT DOES GOOGLE.

UNFORTUNTELY YOU HAVE TO HAVE TO WORD TO KNOW HOW TO GOOGLE IT.
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WE WILL BE SH#TTING -- PUTTING NUMBERS ABOUT 2:45--

FYI
ALL THE NUMBERS GET PLACED ONCE-- THEN NEARLY ALL-- AT RANDOM--- GET PLACED A SECOND TIME JUST TO FILL THE BOARD. I FIGURE THAT IS FAIR BECAUSE OF THE RANDOM CHOOSING AS WE PLACE THEM-- EVERYONE PUTTING ON NUMBERS-- USUALLY ABOUT 6 PEOPLE-- WILL HAAVE A FEW NUMBERS LEFT .. WE CAN NOT PUT THEM 3 TO A SQUARE BECAUSE IF IT IS NOT A TIDY GLOB OF POO WE WOULD HAVE TROUBLE WITH DIVIDING INTO 3RD. ---- DIVIDING EACH SQUARE IN HALF IS NO PROBLEM-- THE DIAGIONAL IS VERY ACCURATE--

AND WE ARE OFF LINE AT THE MOMENT

GOT TO CHASE THAT.

6 comments:

  1. EXCLAMATION!!! [EXCLAMATORY SENTENCE]

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  2. IS "ECSTATIC" THE WORD YOU'RE LOOKING FOR? ; )

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  3. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  4. A PARAPROSDOKIAN SENTENCE IS ONE WITH A SURPRISE OR UNEXPECTED ENDING.

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    Replies
    1. Example of paraprosdokian: "I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas, I don't know" Groucho Marx

      Hope that is what Carlene is looking for. Forgot how funny Groucho could be.

      Delete
  5. Good catch Rose! Here's a page and some samples:

    “She looks as though she's been poured into her clothes, and forgot to say 'when'”?

    "Some days it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps."


    http://english.stackexchange.com/questions/14949/is-there-a-name-for-this-type-of-sentence-structure-she-looks-as-though-shes

    ReplyDelete